Why I Want It

Other gloriously useless things you definitely need:

The Hungover Cookbook

Bright mustard yellow cookbook cover titled The Hungover Cookbook with a small illustration.

When your head feels like a construction site and your stomach is staging a protest, The Hungover Cookbook is your only friend. This hilarious guide offers the perfect culinary roadmap for navigating the morning after without making your internal organs regret your questionable life choices.

Drinking Games Book

Dark blue drinking games book with red logo on a wooden table next to a glass of beer.

Finally, a way to systematically ruin your reputation with friends while sipping booze. This Drinking Games book offers twenty-five distinct ways to lose your dignity, providing the perfect high-stakes competition for your next hazy night of questionable decisions and regrettable memories.

$9ishWANT IT

Ex-Wife's Wedding Dress Book

Hardcover blue book featuring a person in a white wedding dress on a rustic wooden surface.

101 Uses for My Ex-Wife's Wedding Dress is the petty masterpiece your bookshelf is missing. This hilarious guide turns matrimonial wreckage into practical household items, making it the perfect gift for anyone who wants to handle a messy breakup with maximum creative spite.

Holy Meme Bible

Textured white book titled Holy Meme Bible, featuring ornate gold lettering and design.

The Holy Meme Bible is the only spiritual guide you need for your questionable internet history. This 60-page activity book lets you confess your love for your FBI agent and color a badly illustrated Kim Kardashian while reliving the peak brain rot of 2018.

$16ishWANT IT

Global Swearing Guide

Hardcover book showing how to swear around the world with humorous illustrations.

Upgrade your inner rage from "unfiltered yelling" to "sophisticated, multi-lingual flair." How to Swear Around the World is the ultimate guide for the traveler who wants to be internationally offensive while maintaining a level of linguistic class that would make a diplomat blush.

$13ishWANT IT

The Geek's Guide to Dating

Pixel art cover of a book titled The Geek's Guide to Dating, featuring retro gaming characters and hearts.

When your social battery is at 2% but you still want to find a partner who appreciates your obscure hobbies. The Geek's Guide to Dating provides a hilarious, illustrated roadmap for navigating romance without losing your dignity or your precious sanity.

$14ishWANT IT

Drinking Game Monopoly

Chaotic drinking game board featuring red cups and game tokens spread out on a wooden table.

Drink-A-Palooza is essentially the Monopoly of bad decisions and questionable life choices. This chaotic board game mashes up Beer Pong, Flip Cup, and Kings Cup into one high-stakes party experience. It’s the perfect way to ensure your friends never look at you the same way again.

$23ishWANT IT

Harry Potter Pop-Up Book

Harry Potter pop-up book cover illustration of Hogwarts castle and a winged figure.

The Harry Potter Pop-Up Book literally manifests Hogwarts and Diagon Alley in 3D right in front of your face. It’s packed with magical scenes and behind-the-scenes movie secrets, making it the perfect way to relive the wizarding world without the risk of actually being expelled.

$24ishWANT IT

How Not to Kill Your Baby

Humorous parenting guide book titled How Not to Kill Your Baby featuring a teddy bear and a wild bear.

There is a book dedicated to ensuring you don't accidentally kill your baby. How Not to Kill Your Baby is the ultimate survival guide for new parents who need a laugh while navigating the terrifying, sleep-deprived chaos of raising a tiny human without causing a catastrophe.

Woods Survival Guide

Dark green hardcover book titled How to Stay Alive in the Woods, featuring a small flame icon.

If you’re planning on getting lost in the woods, this Woods Survival Guide ensures you actually make it back to civilization in one piece. It covers everything from building shelter to finding food, because "vibes" aren't a valid strategy for self-preservation when the local wildlife starts looking hungry.

$12ishWANT IT

Crap Taxidermy Book

Hardcover Crap Taxidermy book with a humorous illustration of a fox standing on a wooden stand.

Your coffee table deserves the chaotic energy of Crap Taxidermy, a book dedicated to the glorious failures of preservation. From "Dieting Foxes" to "Tabby Gymnastics," these cursed images prove that sometimes, the only thing better than a preserved animal is a really messed-up one.

$9ishWANT IT

Scratchable World Map

Large scratchable world map featuring gold foil for tracking travel destinations and countries.

Finally, a way to turn your travel history into a literal wall of shiny, scratched-off gold. This massive map features a premium foil layer that reveals vibrant colors as you track every country and state line, making your wanderlust look like a high-end, interactive art project.

$29ishWANT IT